You Can't Can Love
Robert William Service
I don’t know how the fishes feel, but I can’t help thinking it odd,
That a gay young flapper of a female eel should fall in love with a cod.
Yet—that’s exactly what she did and it only goes to prove,
That’ what evr you do you can’t put the lid on that crazy feeling Love.
Now that young tom-cod was a dreadful rake, and he had no wish to wed,
But he feared that her foolish heart would break, so this is what he said:
“Some fellows prize a woman’s eyes, and some admire her lips,
While some have a taste for a tiny waist, but—me, what I like is HIPS.”
“So you see, my dear,” said that gay tom-cod, “Exactly how I feel;
Oh I hate to be unkind but I know my mind, and there ain’t no hips on an eel.”
“Alas! that’s true,” said the foolish fish, as she blushed to her finny tips:
“And with might and main, though it gives me pain, I’ll try to develop hips.”
So day and night with all her might she physical culturized;
But alas and alack, in the middle of her back no hump she recognized.
So—then she knew that her love eclipse was fated from the start;
For you never yet saw an eel with hips, so she died of a broken heart.
Chorus:
Oh you’ve gotta hand it out to Love, to Love you can’t can Love
You’ll find it from the bottom of the briny deep to the blue above.
From the Belgin hare to the Polar Bear, and the turtle dove,
You can look where you please, But from elephant to fleas,
You’ll never put the lid on Love.
You can look where you choose, But from crabs to kangaroos,
You’ll never put the lid on Love.
You can look where you like, But from polywogs to pike,
You’ll never put the lid on Love.
You can look where you please, But from buffalo to bees,
You’ll never put the lid on Love.
