The Foolish Dictionary Words starting with B

BABY : From Grk. babai, wonderful. Parents are yet to be heard from who don't think theirs is a "wonder." A nocturnal animal to which everyone in a sleeping-car is eager to give a wide berth.
BACHELOR : From Latin baculus, a stick, unattached. Hence, an unattached man, which any lady may stick, stick to, or get stuck on.
BACKBITER : A mosquito.
BALANCE : Something wanted by book-keepers and often lost by topers. May be found in a cash-book or the kangaroo gait.
BANDIT : An outlaw. See ALDERMAN.

BARBER : A brilliant conversationalist, who occasionally shaves and cuts hair. Syn. for Phonograph.
BARGAIN : A disease common to women, caught in the Sunday papers and developed in department Stores on Mondays. Symptoms, loud talk, pushing and shoving, a combination prize-fight and football scrimmage. (Old spelling 'Bark-gain).
BARS : Things found in harbors, hotels, fences, prisons, courts and music. (Those found in courts and in music are full of beats).
BASEBALL : A game in which the young man who bravely strikes out for himself receives no praise for it.
BAT : Senior partner of Bat, Ball & Co., and never found without the rest of the firm, as it takes several high-balls to make one short bat.

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