The Foolish Dictionary Words starting with B

BIRDIE : A term a woman is apt to apply to a man she is playing for a jay.
BIRTH : An aid to life, discovered by Woman. Higher preferred.
BIRTHDAY : Anniversary of one's birth. Observed only by men and children.
BLUBBER : The useful product of a dead whale. The useless product of a live baby.
BLUE : The only color we can feel. INVISIBLE BLUE A policeman.

BLUSH : A temporary erythema and calorific effulgence of the physiognomy, aeteologized by the perceptiveness of the sensorium, in a predicament of inequilibrity, from a sense of shame, anger or other cause, eventuating in a paresis of the vase-motorial, muscular filaments of the facial capillaries, whereby, being divested of their elasticity, they become suffused with a radiance emanating from an intimidated praecordia.
BOARD : An implement for administering corporal punishment, used by mothers and landladies. "The Festive Board" may be a shingle, a hair-brush a fish-hash breakfast or a stewed prune supper.
BOHEMIA : (Not on the map.) A land flowing with canned milk and distilled honey and untroubled by consistency, convention, conscience or cash. A land to which many are called and few chosen.
BONE : One Dollar--the original price of a wife. Note, Adam, who had to give up one bone before he got Eve.
BONNETS : A female head trouble, which is contracted the latter part of Lent and breaks out on Easter.

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