Jokes : One Liners

It is better to be pissed off than pissed on.
It is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
It is better to rule in hell, then to serve in Heaven.
It is better to wear out then rust out.
It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost of living.

It is really hard to face your problem, when your face is the problem.
It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
It seemed like a silly idea at first, but now I sleep much better with my eyes closed!
It sure would be nice if we got a day off for the president's birthday, like they do for the queen. Of course, then we would have a lot of people voting for a candidate born on July 3 or December 26, just for the long weekends.

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