Jokes : One Liners

It's all fun and games until someone looses and eye, or their virginity.
It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
It's as bad as you think, and they are out to get you.
It's better to be looked over than over looked.
It's better to have beer in hand than gas in tank.

It's impossible to fool proof anything because fools are so ingenious.
It's lonely at the top, but you eat better.
It's morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money.
It's not an optical illusion it just looks like one. - Phil White
It's not hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere.

Next : It's not the fall that kills you, it's the sudden stop., It's not true that oysters make good aphrodisiacs. I tried a dozen once and only six of them worked!, It's okay to love your pets, but just don't love your pets., It's possible that my whole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others. -Ashleigh Brilliant, It's really quite a simple choice: life, death or Los Angeles. -Ashleigh Brilliant, I've changed my mind a dozen times. It seems to work better now., I've finally figured out why you always have that stupid grin on your face ... You're stupid!, I've found the secret of happiness - total disregard of everybody. -Ashleigh Brilliant, I've got a mind like a steel trap - rusty and illegal in 37 states, I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and only suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
Previous : It takes just a little living to make a house a heap., It takes leather balls to play rugby., It takes two to lie, one to lie and one to listen., It was all so different before everything changed. -Ashleigh Brilliant, It was hell, recalls former child., It works better if you plug it in., It would be terrible if the Red Cross Bloodmobile got into an accident. No, wait. That would be good because if anyone needed it, the blood would be right there., It's a good thing that William Ewart Gladstone is dead. He's been buried an awful long time., It's a small world. So you gotta use your elbows a lot., It's a very strange name they picked for Social Security. For what they actually send you, you can't afford to be social nor can you really feel secure.
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