Jokes : One Liners

Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
Learn from your parents mistakes - use birth control!
Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
Let's organize an anarchy
Life in the fast lane isn't all it's cracked up to be. Nearly everyone passes on the right nowadays anyway.

Life is a bitch. Then you die.
Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted all of the time and have the time of your life.
Life is like a cactus. Around every corner there's another prick.
Life is like a sled dog team: if you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.

Next : Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep, Life is too short to drink cheap beer., Life is tough; even the subways are in a hole., Life is what happens to you while you are planning to do something else., Life is what passes you by while you're busy making other plans., Life may have no meaning or, even worse, it may have a meaning of which I disapprove. -Ashleigh Brilliant, Life's a bitch, then you die., Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak, Lighten up we all make big mistakes we pay for forever., Little boy, I don't care if your dog can talk. Please tell him this is a Tardis, not a Way-Back Machine .
Previous : Just say no! to sex with pro-lifers., Just when you thought you were winning the rat race along come faster rats., Keep America beautiful. Swallow your beer cans., Keep your nose to the grindstone and your shoulder to the wheel... it's cheaper than plastic surgery., Kids in the back seat cause accidents; accidents in the back seat cause kids., Kilroy was here, Kiss me twice. I'm schizophrenic., Knowledge was never known to enter the head via an open mouth., Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, Where the heck is the ceiling?!, Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population.
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