Jokes : One Liners

Speak softly and own a big, mean Doberman.
Start off every day with a smile and get it over with.
Stay away from hurricanes for a while.
Sterility is hereditary.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but whips and chains excite me.

STMP T VWLS
Stop repeat offenders. Don't re-elect them!
Stupid mistakes are made by others. We only make unavoidable errors.
Stupidity is self-correcting.
Suicide is the most sincere form of self-criticism.

Next : Support Cannibalism -- Eat Me!, Support mental health or I'll kill you., Support the right to arm bears., Sure you can trust the government! Just ask an Indian!, Sure, everyone wants to save the whales, but not one voice is raised on behalf of the plankton! -Richard Guindon, Surf Nebraska!, Surprise your boss. Get to work on time., T. S. Eliot is an anagram of Toilets., Take me DRUNK, I'm HOME, Talent is the ability to convince people you have it.
Previous : Some people are only alive because it is illegal to kill., Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun. But I have never been able to make out the numbers., Some people cause happiness wherever they go; Others, whenever they go., Someday we'll look back on all this and plow into a parked car., Someone who thinks logically is a nice contrast to the real world., Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let her sleep., Sometimes too much to drink is not enough., Sooner or later you must pay for your sins. Those who have already paid may disregard this message., Sorry, I don't date outside my species., Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)
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